5824: The Blog

State of the House

Roommates, landlord, distinguished guests, friends...

As 5824 goes in its third year, we must look to our past and to our future. Don't do this at the same time because you will get cross-eyed, and you will get a headache. No, take some time to look at the past. Go make yourself a sandwich, pour yourself a soda. Now, you can look toward the future. See? That wasn't so bad, was it?

When we look into our past, we see the awkward years of junior high, the formative years of high school, and the lack of food in our fridge. Currently, our fridge is bare. If I want to make myself a snack, I find myself closing the fridge door disappointed. This is not how a fridge is supposed to be. This is not how a house is supposed to be. We must make more frequent trips to Albertson's, Safeway, and Costco. The supermarket workers at this establishments are not on strike in Northern California, and we should be thankful. Although if they were, we would make some picket signs that read "Stop complaining!" and "You make more money than me!" and join their ranks. Of course, we'd have to take some of our movie props for protection. This is why we had Movie Props Making Day.

Once we make these trips to get food, we must feed ourselves. Then, we must look beyond our borders and feed others. I mean we should have more BBQs. Last year, we only had one. This is far too little for 5824. This house must be a house that shines in BBQ glory. We cannot sit back and allow perfectly good weekends go by without ribs, chicken, and hot links. We were once a house that hosted legendary BBQs, and we must go back to that. We must be at the forefront of BBQ prominence. Also, let it be known that we will not be intimidated by mad cow. Mad Cal will kick Mad Cow's ass in a street fight. Bring it!

It may seem that we are picking fights. Already, we may have angered some supermarket employees and some cows. These are good fights. These are noble fights. However, if we are to engage in them, we must do so with friends. We look to the south and possibly find contention, but this must end. We must forge an alliance with our friends in the South Bay. This is why I propose that in our next Movie Props Making Day, delegates from South Bay be invited. With our efforts combined, we can make super movie props. With these super movie props, we will fight mad cow and we will win!

In this past year, 5824 has made some serious moves in the television viewing department. In our living room, we have not one, not two, but three TVs. Some said this was crazy, some said it simply couldn't be done. We have shown the world that a house with three TVs in one room can exist, and it can flourish. The combinations are limitless. We can watch three different sporting events at once. Or two video games and a basketball game. Or a football game, a basketball game, and Mad Cal playing Manhunt. Limitless. If our neighbors do not believe in the system, let them come and take part in it. We have the highest confidence that the experience will make you a believer.

This year, 5824 may see some changes. Occupations, school, hairstyles. All of these things could change. We will not this affect us. We can not let this affect us, for we are 5824. We are not simply residents in a house with an address. We are three men that, despite our poor eating habits and our irregular sleeping schedule, stand united in times of distress and in times of happiness. 5824 may be on the outside of our house, but it is also emblazoned in our hearts. God bless.